Existential therapy is a method of therapy that is based on philosophy and that believes that humans struggle with an inner conflict because they are confronted with certain givens of existence that they cannot change. So existential therapy is all about the human condition. It looks to uncover positive aspects of humanity and human abilities, all the while underlining the fact that humans are limited. With existential therapy, people don’t look at the past, as in other types of therapy. They focus on the present moment and the meaning behind existence personalized according to each individual.
Even though we’ve briefly covered the topic of existential therapy before, we focused more on what existentialism is and what are some existential questions that humans tend to ask themselves. However, we thought it would be useful to delve more into the topic, since it is so complex. Today, we are going to explore the history of existential therapy a bit more. Furthermore, we are going to look at the existentialist theory and models, and see how it can benefit us. Let’s begin!
Brief History of Existential Therapy
Rollo May is considered to be the father of American Existential Psychotherapy. But you should know that a lot of famous people influenced his work. For instance, Friedrich Nietzsche, Søren Kierkegaard, and Martin Heidegger were all existential philosophers. Kierkegaard believed that we can only put a stop to our discontent regarding human condition by looking at our internal wisdom. Later on, Nietzsche talked about free will and how we are all responsible for our actions in this world. Heidegger further explored in the early 1900s how people can heal by investigating and interpreting their lives. In the decades that followed, more and more theorists started to put forth the idea of healing through experiencing. This is how the field of existential therapy was created.
Man cannot endure his own littleness unless he can translate it into meaningfulness on the largest possible level. – Ernest Becker
Existentialist Theory
As we’ve already mentioned, when it comes to existential theory, people don’t focus on past events. That is, they don’t linger on them, but they do use them to gain some insight. They don’t blame events in the past for present outcomes, but they use them to assert themselves and promote freedom. The idea is that your past does not define you. You can make your own destiny and not expect for it to be dictated by past experiences.
Existential theory is more about the freedom and capacity of interpretation of the subject, rather than about the therapist imposing certain ideas or models of his or her own. The therapist is simply there to assist the subject as he or she forms his or her own perspective on life and elucidates any mystery that might get uncovered.
This type of therapy involves an open-minded approach. There are things that can surface which will challenge a therapist’s assumptions. The therapist has to deliberately strip away judgement and be able to understand certain assumptions of the subject that not even the subject himself or herself can make sense of.
The theory behind existential therapy relies on the belief that humans long to connect to other people. That is even though they are essentially alone. This is how they become concerned with certain givens of existence.
What Are the Givens of Existence?
American existential psychiatrist Irvin David Yalom is the one who came up with these givens of existence that sometimes torment people. There are four of them: the inevitability of death, freedom and its responsibility, meaninglessness, and existential isolation.
These givens of existence are what make people feel dread or existential anxiety. Or to be more precise, it is not the givens per se, but the acknowledgement and confrontation of these givens by the subject. By struggling with this anxiety, people decrease their awareness of the four realms or levels of experience: physical, spiritual, social, and psychological. This process can have severe consequences. For instance, let’s take the example of the inevitability of death.
Someone suddenly becomes aware of the fact that his or her loved ones will eventually die. This might fill the subject with such an anxiety that he or her might start denying reality. We deny reality when we don’t want to accept an event that would bring us pain, such as someone close to us dying. However, if we ignore death and reduce our awareness of it, we also stop making decisions that could actually protect us from it in the present moment or in the future.
At the same time, other people might react differently to this acknowledgement of inevitable death. They can become so anxious about it that they become neurotic or psychotic. What existential therapy aims to teach people is how to be aware of death. At the same time, it also focuses on how not to allow ourselves to become overwhelmed by it. The key is in this healthy balance that determines us to make the right choices for us and our loved ones. The idea is that we will never know the outcome of our decisions. However, being aware of death should encourage us to live our lives to the fullest while we can.
The Four Realms of Existence and Their Meaning
In the above section we talked about the so-called four realms of existence or experience: physical, spiritual, social, and psychological. Now, let’s take a closer look at each of them, in order to understand how existential therapy uses them to make people aware of what the context of their worries is.
The physical realm is all about the world that we as humans share with other creatures. It is the world where we have bodily needs, where we sleep, where we have desires, and where we find relief. This is the realm of death as well, but also of birth and other physical symptoms.
The spiritual realm refers to how our ideal world would look like. It includes our beliefs, values, religion, and spirituality in general. This is a realm of transcendence, where we as humans try to understand our lives and the mysteries surrounding it.
The social realm is where we can find all of our relationships, no matter of what nature they are. It is how we act around our families, friends, or in society. It is about whether we respect authority or not, and how we behave at work and inside our culture at large. If you were wondering where we can find our emotions, this is the realm that contains them.
Finally, the psychological realm is strictly concerned with our definition of self. It is about who we are and how well we know ourselves, what is our identity, what are our major characteristic, and whether or not we have a sense of self. Are we authentic selves? What are our strengths? What about our weaknesses? We can answer all of these questions in the psychological realm.
How Does Existential Therapy Help Us?
We have now reached the last part of our guide to existential therapy. Here, we would like to focus on a few of the benefits of this type of therapy. Perhaps one of the most obvious ones is the fact that existential therapy helps us face our fears regarding our existence. We all have them at some point in our life, although some people suffer more because of them than others. Another benefit of this therapy is the fact that it makes us aware of our ability to take matters into our own hands and make our own decisions. However, it also focuses a lot on the responsibilities that come with making our own choices.
If you go through existential therapy, chances are you are going to come out a more authentic person who focuses less on superficial things and more on making the best of each moment.
