There’s nothing nice about feeling less than, but it’s something that we all experience from time to time. Whether we’re just feeling down about ourselves or have been comparing ourselves to someone else and their achievements, the feeling of inferiority isn’t a nice one but it’s often fleeting.
Some people never have this feeling pass through, and will experience a fundamental feeling of inadequacy. In this case, it may be an inferiority complex that’s causing the issues and therefore will require further discussion and treatment.
Nobody wants to feel down about themselves constantly, but thankfully there are some helpful ways to get over this complex if you are suffering from it. We’re going to look at the signs and symptoms of an inferiority complex as well as ways you can work through it so that you don’t have to suffer any longer.
What Is An Inferiority Complex?
The inferiority complex began with an idea mentioned by Sigmund Freud and was expanded on by Carl Jung from the psychoanalytic brand of psychology. From there, another famed psychologist Alfred Alder looked deeper into it and found that those who had neurolytic tendencies could usually be traced back to feelings of inferiority.
In comparison to a superiority complex where someone overcompensates their positive feelings or how good they are, the inferiority complex leaves the patient always feeling as though they’re never good enough. The complex is often subconscious with people not realizing they’re acting out in certain ways that would indicate feelings of inferiority, and so it can be hard to treat.
Alfred Alder surmised that there were two different types of inferiority to be found:
- Primary inferiority usually comes from a childhood experience of feeling helpless and weak. This is intensified by their constant comparison to other siblings, their parents, adults, and romantic partners.
- Secondary inferiority occurs during adulthood when the individual is unable to reach their fictional final goal of security and success. Feeling that they are far away from the goal then leads to a depressive state which causes them to remember the primary feeling of inferiority.
Where this becomes an issue is that there’s a repetitive cycle of both primary and secondary inferior feelings. The individual is unable to escape from the cycle and their efforts to get reassurance about themselves which then leads to further feelings of worthlessness.
When Inferiority Becomes A Problem
Developing an inferiority complex usually stems from childhood or previous failures where someone has felt they weren’t good enough. This could include feelings of being different due to race, physical appearance, lack of skill in a certain sport or activity, coming from a lower social class, or being called names or receiving criticism from parent, teachers, and peers.
The feelings of inferiority during childhood and adulthood can be completely normal though, especially given previous events like the aforementioned. Because as humans we all experience these feelings occasionally, it can be hard to determine when one is a clinical condition and another is just about wanting better for ourselves. How then do you know when your thoughts of inferiority are actually more than just the average amount?
Everyone experiences feelings of inferiority from time to time, and according to classical Adlerian psychology, these feelings are often used as a stimulant towards development. However, the condition and thoughts can become pathological when you feel overwhelmed by them and they are depressing you, rather than pushing you towards development.
Signs and Symptoms of Inferiority Complex
For those who suspect either themselves or a loved one may be suffering from an inferiority complex, there are symptoms to look out for. This can help determine whether they are experiencing regular feelings of a lack of self-worth or whether it’s something more permanent.
Demeaning others
It’s pretty common knowledge that those who don’t feel good about themselves will criticize others, and the same is true for the inferiority complex. Sometimes pointing out ‘flaws’ in others helps to relieve some of their own feelings of inferiority.
Social withdrawal
If you notice that yourself or someone has been increasingly removed from social situations then they may be experiencing this condition. Being around others only highlights to them their worthlessness and so they may avoid it at all costs.
Procrastination and inaction
Constantly avoiding achieving anything or setting goals and never meeting them are two signs of someone with an inferiority complex. They do this to avoid the inevitable failure that they feel is going to occur when they try something.
Lack of sportsmanship
Competing in any kind of activity with others usually brings out their worst side and they can get upset about losing.
Blaming external factors
These people look to blame anyone else for things that happen, including the universe. A belief that the world is out to get them or that they always have bad luck in life is common in these individuals.
Seeking attention
Sometimes this complex can show itself with attention seeking behavior like angry outbursts or being over the top. They may even start fishing for compliments from others or pretend to be sick or sad to get extra attention.
Extreme sensitivity
Being sensitive to both compliments and criticisms is normal for someone with an inferiority complex. If given a compliment they question its validity and if being criticized they take it to heart too much.
5 Tips for Treatment
Inferiority complex can be hard to overcome as it’s usually the cause of deep-seated emotional issues that began in childhood. However, there are some things that you can do to try and solve your feelings of inadequacy and get on with your life with a better attitude.
Deal with memories
As most inferiority complexes stem from childhood, it’s important to look back at the memories you have which may be leading to this problem. Think about the situation and try to look back at it as a subjective person and see why the criticism or inadequacy isn’t as big of a deal as you made.
Be yourself
Too often we spend so long trying to be like other people and achieve what they have that we forget we are our own person. Feelings of inadequately almost always come up due to these comparisons we make to other people. Try to start seeing yourself as an individual with your own skills, goals, and positive attributes and avoid making comparisons to others.
Know what you want
Rather than thinking about what society expects or what other people of your age/gender/career path are doing and think about what you really want. What would things make you happy in life? Are you working towards those or what other people claim you should want? Get a specific idea of your own personal goals and not those of others, and focus only on achieving those.
Avoid ‘utopianism’ thinking
This type of thinking is an all or nothing approach that can be dangerous. We think things like ‘if I lose 20 pounds I’ll be happy’ or ‘if I make $10,000 more a year I’ll be successful’. The problem with these thoughts is that even if you achieve the original goal, you’ll still find something else to strive for. You need to deal with your emotional issues if you’re ever going to be happy.
Stop being selective
When we compare ourselves to others we often go to the extremes. Comparing your smarts to a Nobel Peace Prize winner or comparing your looks to a celebrity will always lead to feelings of inadequacy. If you can’t help comparing yourself to others, try to do it with real life people and not just one or two who happen to be successful.
Learning to Love Yourself
It’s normal to feel less than others and compare yourself to the successes of those around you, but it should never become so bad that it’s overwhelming your thoughts. Feeling inferior can be a great motivator to improve your life so if it’s not doing that for you, you may need to seek out help to adjust the way you think.
We can often be our own worst critic but when that inner critic begins to take over it’s time for action. Try our tips for adjusting your thoughts to feeling inferior or seek out help from a professional if these thoughts begin to overwhelm your entire life.
