Shunryu Suzuki in “Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind” wrote: “When you are practicing meditation, do not try to stop your thinking. Let it stop by itself. If something comes into your mind, let it come in, and let it go out. It will not stay long. When you try to stop your thinking, it means you are bothered by it. Do not be bothered by anything. It appears as if something comes from outside your mind, but actually it is only the waves of your mind, and if you are not bothered by the waves, gradually they will become calmer and calmer.”
Obsession includes constantly figuring things out, worrying about something or everything without resolution, feeling angry a lot, guilty a lot and so on. Obsessions are a distraction that give us temporary relief from deeper emotional pain, which is imagined to be more painful. For example, I might obsess about something or someone because I do not want to feel helpless. I do not what to accept the fact that I can only control situations or people to a very small degree. Mentally ruminating about anything is exhausting.
Meditation, Resting the mind
Therefore, we need a gentle focus when thinking and feeling begin to take us over. It can help to take a break from obsessing. We can rest the mind, just as we would rest the body. We can take ten minutes, a half hour or even some days to just rest the mind. Then, after resting the mind, we can go back to problem solving with a stronger and clearer perception.
Meditation with obsessive thoughts and feelings
Disentangling from obsession involves focus on the present moment; the sounds, the light and the smells. We can gradually relax into the body and breath, little by little, as the feelings and thoughts come toward us like waves. The goal is to not fight with thoughts and feelings or get seduced by their story. Just to stay with the body and breath for longer and longer periods of time is enough at this point. Self reflection and looking at our problems come after the rest.
A few meditation tips to slow obsession:
Focus just on the out breath through the nose, then just on the in breath, even say a word to yourself as you breath out, such as, relax, let go, rest,or any word that is meaningful to you.
Pause at the the end of the out breath, holding the breath out, and pause and hold the breath in when completing the in-breath, repeat as necessary.
Consider the space between breaths as sacred. Then, consider the space between periods of thinking as sacred, gradually elongating this period.
After that, consider the thoughts and feelings as sacred, as what they may teach.
We are really resting our ambition and control, resting the mind in the heart, resting the mind in just being, just sitting, just walking, just washing the dishes. Being less bothered by the waves of feelings and thoughts allows for a calming, then we can reflect and make clearer decisions about ourselves, others and the ways of the world.
